Have you had a secret in your past that, at some point, you decided to tell someone about it? Did they respond in a way that you expected they would or did their response surprise you? In today’s journal entry, the writer explains how she finally told her parents about the abortion and the different ways in which they responded.
After months and months of hiding my abortion from my parents, I finally told them. Last night after dinner, I asked them if we could sit down and talk because I had something that I wanted to talk to them about. We sat down and immediately my heart starting beating faster and I became very nervous. They could tell by my body language that the conversation was not going to be a happy one.
I took a deep breath and I said “I am about to tell you something that is really difficult to talk about and I want to say what I need to say before either of you interrupt me. Once I am finished you guys can share your thoughts and ask whatever questions you may have. Please know that I love you and that I never want to hurt or disappoint you guys.” Then I told them about how I was pregnant and my now ex-boyfriend wanted nothing to do with me or our baby when I told him that I was pregnant. I told them about how I want to finish school so badly and I did not see that being a possibility if I went through with the pregnancy. I would have been a 22-year old single mother. I was crying so hard as I was telling them and I did not have the strength to look either of my parents in the eyes so I just stared down at my lap. When I finally finished saying what I needed to say to them, I looked up at them.
My mom was sobbing. I’m not sure I have ever seen her cry so hard. She immediately got up and hugged me so tight. She said to me, “I love you and I am here for you no matter what. I am so sorry that you went through all of this alone and I can’t even begin to imagine how difficult that must have been.” My dad was also crying, however he did not hug me or really say anything to me. It is hard to tell if he was angry or what he was thinking. I apologized again for keeping my abortion from them. But I finally told them. That was the hardest part. We can only move forward from here.
The rest of that night, I spent talking to my mom. My dad went to bed really early without saying much to me. I hope he isn’t mad; maybe he’s just processing all that I told him. My mom was asking me a lot of questions and she said that she knew that something was bothering me because I haven’t been myself lately. It all makes sense now. I feel a lot better after telling them. A huge weight was lifted from me. I’m looking forward to moving past this as a family now.
The Restore Program was created to help teens and adults process through their abortion experiences and get to a place of deeper healing. Please call or text Restore at 630-599-0043 today to find out more about our free and strictly confidential post abortion recovery program.